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6 Things You Should Never be Afraid to Say

Afraid? At this point in my life, there are just some things I have to get off my chest. 

Oh trust me, my mouth has gotten me into trouble A LOT of times!

But, to be honest, when I look back on certain situations there are some things I wish I did say; things that could’ve potentially saved me heartache, disappointment and regret.

As kids growing up, our parents hammered into us that we should always “watch your mouth!” They told us that there are some feelings you shouldn’t make public and some words, although not profane, should never come out of our mouths.

We grew up with this same mindset, unfortunately, and carried it into adulthood.

One of the good things about being an adult though, is the fact that we now set the rules for our lives. We choose (some more carefully than others) what we say, do and how we act.

The older I’ve gotten, the more I’ve realised that society has conditioned us to constantly be afraid of certain words, phrases and even feelings.

Well I’ve never been one to follow all of the “rules,” and sometimes that’s a good thing.

6 Things You Should Never be Afraid to Say 

“No” – Child, you are not entitled to do anything you don’t want to do. It’s ok to disappear, it’s ok to not be available, it’s ok to not be the friend of convenience, it’s ok to say “NO!” I’ve found that…

The more yeses I've given to people, the more noes I've suffered for myself Click To Tweet

“I’ve changed my mind” – Yup. You can have a change of mind and a change of heart. Don’t be bullied or shamed into thinking that just because you’ve agreed to, obliged or committed to someone that you have to go all the way through with it. I am a woman of my word, and I always do what I say I’ll do. But if something requires closer attention and after much thought I realise that it wouldn’t be in my best mental, emotional, physical or financial interest to follow through, then all bets are off. With no apologies.

READ SIMILAR: Don’t Believe the Hype! Everyone IS NOT Entitled to Your Energy!

“I need a job” – For some reason there’s a lot of shame and embarrassment laced throughout this statement, especially in the black community, and I don’t know why. For some reason, everyone expects you to have it all together, to have it figured out, to flawlessly ride over life’s bumps and come out unscathed. Well sometimes it just doesn’t happen that way and usually when people find themselves looking for the next dollar, needing a becomes a big secret, when it really shouldn’t be. The saying’s true…closed mouths don’t get fed!

“I can’t” – I CAN’T! Say it with me…”I CAN’T!” This can go one of two ways, in fact. Either we’re doubling back on being able to say no; tapping into that “I can’t be available for you,” or you’re letting someone in on a weakness and admitting to not being able to do something, which is fine.

Vulnerability is such a beautiful thing when shared with the right person Click To Tweet

Letting someone know you can’t do something, complete a task, is physically incapable of getting something done, is ok. You’re human.

READ MY LATEST BLOG! Older than 18? You’re Not A Mean Girl, You’re A Mean Woman

“I need help” – You can’t do life alone, it’s a fact, and sometimes, yes, you need help. There’s nothing wrong with letting this be known. I know sometimes pride gets in the way and we seek to bear all of our burdens alone…but we don’t have to.

“I’m sorry” – Ahhhh, perhaps the hardest of them all to say, but oh so necessary.

I'm sorry fixes so many things, prevents so many things, heals so many things...and people Click To Tweet

Quite frankly, it isn’t said enough. There’s so much power in those two little words, making life much easier for the the person on both sides of, “I’m sorry.”

6 Things You Should Never be Afraid to Say

Are you afraid to say any of these phrases? Tell me in the comments below! 

 

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6 Responses
  • Tracey Crockett
    September 12, 2017

    At 50+ I’ve learned how to say ALL of these things with bravado lol! Honestly, the hardest thing I’ve had the hardest time saying is GOODBYE. Everything else was a breeze being the alpha woman with a militant spirit that I am..Blame it on my Dad for the most part, but Mom is a bit of a handful too!

    • ianthia
      September 12, 2017

      lol! Yes!
      Goodbye is another one! it’s so needed sometimes and we need to say it more!

  • Dieulita
    September 10, 2017

    I had to teach myself to say no, that I changed my mind and I am still working on I need help. By far the most important one for me is “I quit”, it was thee most liberating sentence that I said last year.

    • ianthia
      September 10, 2017

      OMG!!!!!!!! So true! I quit is my absolutely fave! How could I forget it?! I said 3 years ago and have had no regrets! Thanks so much for reading!

      • Paul Riley
        September 11, 2017

        I am learning just how therapeutic that is, living in denial is depressing.
        You spend everyday over thinking every decision you’re have ever made ,it spawns indecisiveness,and too mush time wasted,simple no I can’t ,i need a job and I need help. make us free to enjoy life.

        • ianthia
          September 11, 2017

          Absolutely! You save yourself so much stress by just expressing yourself! Thanks for reading!